Thursday, November 22, 2012
Major Depression Arriving
To sleep perchance to dream....not bloody likely! Hurricanes are like Florida holidays, you only go on one every three years and then one turns up. Last time it lashed down on St Pete's every time we stuck our noses out the door, but this time it's a full on evacuation and every man for themselves - Jesus these Yanks need to grow a backbone.
Any chance of sleeping tonight has been sucked out of me by two things - wind and fear - it's amazing how often those two things go together - as Hurricane Isaac hits Orlando with all the force of a baseball bat against the skull of a of a small mammal. The rain against our window sounds biblical and that's with a screen around the pool in the way - it's completely epic.
Once sun rises, which in the circumstances is a relative term, we make plans for a day stuck in by deciding to go to the supermarket and stock up on essentials, batten down the hatches, and eat and drink ourselves into a stupor while the storm rages outside. So it is that me and Moz find ourselves in a monsoon outside Winn Dixie with a shopping list that consists of very few words - lunch and cheesecake. This is probably the greatest shopping list of all time as far as I'm concerned.
As we enter the store though, a sort of eerie calm settles around us to balance out the raging storm outside. We're approached by a spotty youth with a bad bri-nylon suit and badge declaring him to be assistant under manager of cheese. "Hello!!" he declaims, you're our first customers of the day!" it's 10.30......
Anyway, we purchase provisions including the "World's Largest Cheesecake Officially Sold For Under Ten Bucks" and head off home......
Except...
Well, you see there's a Harley Davison showroom on our way back, and although I'm petrified of motorbikes more than just about anything else, I do think their products are automotive beauty unsurpassed. I resist buying a beautiful metallic orange..... errmmm, well motorbike, and instead plump for a bright orange Harley T-Shirt instead, figuring I'm far less likely to kill my self wearing a T-Shirt than riding a 1,200 CC hog.
Surprisingly after a lunch of meat and bread, we're delighted to find that the weather clears and so hastily make arrangements to go out for the day. And universally we decide Universal is the destination. Unfortunately Mr M has woken up with a fucked back so it is once again down to Madame Caitlin Olivia Denny Morris Fenty to hold up the family end and ride the coasters with the Robertson contingent. The Rocket is mastered again, as is Despicable Me, with the wimps and injured riding on the pensioner's seats, and ET, which, to be fair is beyond shit and on it's way to fucking awful even as we queue.
And so it's back to the house to eat, as we thought we'd be housebound all day. I would quite happily have gone out but we have bought enough grub to support a small Army, and so the evening ends with Marco Polo nosh all round and finishing as many previously open bottles of wines as is possible. Considering we were supposed to be evacuated coz of the storm, I seem to think that this has turned out to be a reasonably succesful day.
Any chance of sleeping tonight has been sucked out of me by two things - wind and fear - it's amazing how often those two things go together - as Hurricane Isaac hits Orlando with all the force of a baseball bat against the skull of a of a small mammal. The rain against our window sounds biblical and that's with a screen around the pool in the way - it's completely epic.
Once sun rises, which in the circumstances is a relative term, we make plans for a day stuck in by deciding to go to the supermarket and stock up on essentials, batten down the hatches, and eat and drink ourselves into a stupor while the storm rages outside. So it is that me and Moz find ourselves in a monsoon outside Winn Dixie with a shopping list that consists of very few words - lunch and cheesecake. This is probably the greatest shopping list of all time as far as I'm concerned.
Anyway, we purchase provisions including the "World's Largest Cheesecake Officially Sold For Under Ten Bucks" and head off home......
Except...
Well, you see there's a Harley Davison showroom on our way back, and although I'm petrified of motorbikes more than just about anything else, I do think their products are automotive beauty unsurpassed. I resist buying a beautiful metallic orange..... errmmm, well motorbike, and instead plump for a bright orange Harley T-Shirt instead, figuring I'm far less likely to kill my self wearing a T-Shirt than riding a 1,200 CC hog.
Surprisingly after a lunch of meat and bread, we're delighted to find that the weather clears and so hastily make arrangements to go out for the day. And universally we decide Universal is the destination. Unfortunately Mr M has woken up with a fucked back so it is once again down to Madame Caitlin Olivia Denny Morris Fenty to hold up the family end and ride the coasters with the Robertson contingent. The Rocket is mastered again, as is Despicable Me, with the wimps and injured riding on the pensioner's seats, and ET, which, to be fair is beyond shit and on it's way to fucking awful even as we queue.
And so it's back to the house to eat, as we thought we'd be housebound all day. I would quite happily have gone out but we have bought enough grub to support a small Army, and so the evening ends with Marco Polo nosh all round and finishing as many previously open bottles of wines as is possible. Considering we were supposed to be evacuated coz of the storm, I seem to think that this has turned out to be a reasonably succesful day.
# posted by Bucko! @ 3:09 PM 
