Monday, September 03, 2012
The Looser the Waistband - Tues 20/08
As Sir Mix-a-lot once said “I like big butts and I can not lie, you other brothers can’t deny….”. Well, he should whisk himself down to Florida Florida adults being overweight and 23.30% of those clinically obese, it looks like Florida
Having had a lazy day yesterday we are all up bright and early for a trip to a new park for us all; Disney’s Animal Kingdom. With two of our party having previously been to Kenya for a proper safari, and with my only other experience of such being in Windsor – the highlight of which was a Monkey shitting on our car bonnet – my hopes aren’t high for a memorable day. I couldn’t have been more wrong……
One of the reasons for such an early start was the African Animal Safari. We were told to do it early for two reasons: 1) It’s very popular and 2) once it heats up, all the Animals fuck off. So early it is then…
And as we lumber around on the far-too-authentic rickety bus, we get to see every kind of African animal possible; Giraffes – both Reticulated and Saharan – (which I now know is the fastest land animal in the world because an American bloke behind me said so. I wish I’d gone to school in America
Further great animals followed once we’d finished the ride – A huge butted greyback gorilla who definitely mooned us (with his huge, big butt), the cutest little baby gorilla who made us all go “ahhhaa”, beautiful Tigers, Corobus Monkeys (who seemed to have both free reign of the park and particularly ugly, big butts), loads of different birds and rather brilliantly a huge komodo dragon which lead Moz to tell Conor “There’s more deadly bacteria in its mouth than up your butt”. Quite…
Of course, no park in Orlando
Rather oddly, even while we’re not looking at animals, the big butt theme continues with some of the most enormous posteriors known to man putting on a show – even the big greyback has nothing on some of these booties….
The evening gets off to a truly excellent start when Conor, full of the exuberance and joys of youth, completely stacks it getting into the cab. I would have picked him up but I was laughing too much.
We’ve decided to go posh for tea tonight, and what could be more posh than the intriguingly named Red Lobster restaurant? I’m not sure what to expect, but I hear they do a nice crab dinner.
Not only is the place far more upmarket than I was expecting, turns out the food is excellent too, much nicer than I would expect from a chain. Several of us have the Lobster tail, Scallops and Shrimps, and it’s exactly like the picture in the menu, not like McDonald’s at all (apologies for in joke there folks!) A few nice glasses of vino slip down to to bring an already excellent day to a big butted end.
# posted by Bucko! @ 10:31 AM 
