Thursday, September 17, 2009
T-Minus 24
Entry date: Friday 7th August 2009…but I had an excuse. See, since the beginning of the year I’ve lost 21lbs and so most of my clothes don’t fit. Combine this with the fact that not having a paying job means I’ve not been able to buy anything new, and I’m rather limited to what I can take away with me and not look like Demis Roussos after a crash diet (without the beard of course…..)
I tell my wife this as she contemplates the empty suitcase which should be bagged, tagged and ready and waiting in the downstairs hallway. Luckily, she has a plan. See, a couple of years back I actually weighed 21lbs less than I do now, so had got into the habit of buying clothes in L, rather than the more common XL to be found in my wardrobe. All it takes is a few minutes rummaging in the deepest, darkest recesses of my closet - past the cricket gear that’s not seen the light of day for many a season and behind the slide projector redundant since the onset of the digital camera – and lo and behold we (ahem…) manage to rustle up 5 t-shirts that don’t look either too old from residing unloved at the back of the cupboard for so long, nor too tent-like once hanging from my now positively sylph-like frame. Add 3 pairs of pants (one for each week) a pair of socks and my sunnies and BINGO!, we’re all set. Well, that was easy, I don’t know what all the fuss was about…
Now all that’s left to do is kill the hours before the inevitable early bedtime required by law when you’re off the airport and as usual, I can’t settle. All I can think about is plane crashes, swine flu, have I packed too much, am I fat enough to get in to America and inevitably, as I at last manage to drift off to sleep…will there be toilets when we get there?
I tell my wife this as she contemplates the empty suitcase which should be bagged, tagged and ready and waiting in the downstairs hallway. Luckily, she has a plan. See, a couple of years back I actually weighed 21lbs less than I do now, so had got into the habit of buying clothes in L, rather than the more common XL to be found in my wardrobe. All it takes is a few minutes rummaging in the deepest, darkest recesses of my closet - past the cricket gear that’s not seen the light of day for many a season and behind the slide projector redundant since the onset of the digital camera – and lo and behold we (ahem…) manage to rustle up 5 t-shirts that don’t look either too old from residing unloved at the back of the cupboard for so long, nor too tent-like once hanging from my now positively sylph-like frame. Add 3 pairs of pants (one for each week) a pair of socks and my sunnies and BINGO!, we’re all set. Well, that was easy, I don’t know what all the fuss was about…
Now all that’s left to do is kill the hours before the inevitable early bedtime required by law when you’re off the airport and as usual, I can’t settle. All I can think about is plane crashes, swine flu, have I packed too much, am I fat enough to get in to America and inevitably, as I at last manage to drift off to sleep…will there be toilets when we get there?
# posted by Bucko! @ 10:00 AM 
